A confession and hope for going on.

First of all, dear readers, Happy New Beginning.

Within the past year, I have learned many things, unlearned a few, and fell too many times to count.

Yet.....

With all the the mistakes,blunders, and selfish actions....God still has not left.

His love is completely humiliating to me. It convicts me sometimes and others have completely ignored his calling.

I've written the past few years about the amazing love of God, But absolute truth is there are still corners of my heart that evade his complete control. There is no place for me to feel sorry for my self in this..

This year I hope that he give only Himself...So much that if He were to withdraw himself, I would feel it.

Also, that this year I'd  like to rest. I know now that my striving to be good comes to naught.  I also  know he is not disappointed in who he created and is not now either.


He calls me his beloved son. Just like Christ. I'm part of an inheritance that He wants on earth as it is in heaven.Part of His chosen Bride.

 May his Bride go forth this year and be further purified by His hand. May we set ourselves aside for what he would give us.

A Meditation

When vision fadeth
And the sense of things
and powers dissolve 
like colors in the wind
And no more can I bring any offering 
Nor an ordered prayer....


Then like a great wind from paradise...


Falleth a healing word upon mine ear.


Let the lifting up of my hands be as the evening offering


THE LORD DOES HEAR


Amy Carmichael

A great poem from Union And Communion or Thoughts on the Song of Solomon by Hudson Taylor

The living Vine, Christ chose it for Himself
— God gave to man for use and sustenance
Corn, wine, and oil, and each of these is good:
And Christ is Bread of life and Light of life.
But yet, He did not choose the summer corn,
 That shoots up straight and free in one quick growth.
 And has its day, is done, and springs no more;
 Nor yet the olive, all whose boughs are spread In the soft air,
and never lose a leaf,
 Flowering and fruitful in perpetual peace;

But only this, for Him and His is one,—
 That everlasting, ever-quickening Vine,
 That gives the heat and passion of the world,
 Through its own life-blood, still renewed and shed.
 * * * * * *
 The Vine from every living limb bleeds wine;
Is it the poorer for that spirit shed?
The drunkard and the wanton drink thereof;
 Are they the richer for that gift's excess?
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain;
 Not by the wine drunk,
 but the wine poured forth;
 For love's strength standeth in love's sacrifice
; And whoso suffers most, hath most to give.

Taylor, James Hudson (2006). Union And Communion or Thoughts on the Song of Solomon (p. 65). Public Domain Books. Kindle Edition.

Walking in the rain with your love.

Walking in the rain with the love of your life can be romantic. I can vouch for this.

 I mean you want to be together through everything right? Rain or shine? Sometimes you're even closer in the rain in fact.

LOL....

 The SUNNY DAY
Walking through life with THE LOVER is similar. You seem to feel close (at least I do) to God when things are easy, problems seem to fix themselves, and you feel in love with God.

RAINY DAY
Then the rains come. Most people as soon as the rain starts run for shelter. But sometimes there is some crazy lovestruck pair that seem to refuse to get to shelter. They find it "romantic" to spend time walking in the rain.

 Then compare it to the relationship with Christ. Many Christians today tend to run for "shelter" when the difficulties arise. They feel safe from the storm and seeming alot smarter than the couple walking out in the rain.

Now to the beloved's point of view.

You feel more alive than ever! This storm has caused you to draw closer together! As you feel the warmth of walking beside the Lover, you see those poor people out under their "shelters" with the leaky roofs,  cold and without light . As you call out to them many just point and laugh. Others are curious, so they venture out towards you. As they get closer, they too feel warmer. You start to realize the storm brought others to HIM who is the warmth and the light. This experience causes obsession. After a while warmth feels a great area and those who are filled with the warmth are sent to the shelters of the COLD and DARK. They bring news of the great light who makes it all.


I think I just got an idea for a story!
WOW! GOD IS AMAZING!

The three relationships..

 This isn't a new  idea but it seemed like a good idea to post on. 


In our walk with Christ, we have three different stages of relationship: stranger, friend,and beloved. Each of these have a different intimacy level, different pains and trials we go through, and deeper joys as we draw closer to Christ. This is one of my thoughts, not necessarily a fact with everyone.




First, we enter the stranger phase with Christ.It is also the point we are servants.This is like being in the outer courts. We only hear what is going on inside. This is sometimes the point we hear about Him, but not always have much experience ourselves. In this stage we are often drawn to Christ fort different reasons. Some for curiosity,hope in a hard time, or many other reasons. We aren't really close to Christ and it is sometimes easy just to walk away. But if we stay, he calls us to become friends.




I do not call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends, because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my father. --John 15:15
In the friend stage, we are called to really hear him for ourselves. It is like when the priest entered the inner courts. We get to partake of the feast of his bounty.He speaks to us like he did the disciples. The hardships we go through are like that of the disciples. We must leave our own lives and follow. We often get discouraged because we may have to leave our family and friends to do so. This stage is probably one of great joy and like climbing a  spiritual mountain as well. Then after a while we are thrown into the furnace like gold to be purified....into lovers. 


Into the gems of his delight.As the beloved we lose ourselves. All we are is a reflection of the Lover of All. The pain of leaving his side is absolutely unbearable. This place is both frightening and exciting at the same time. Frightening since we are totally exposed. Exciting because we are exposed to the one who really loves. It is the Holy of Holies to be a beloved.